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Consent to Treatment (2/?)
Title: Consent to Treatment (2/?)
Author: Blu (BluAlbino)
Pairing: JD/Dr. Cox
Rating: T/PG-13
Warnings: AU
Summary: Percival Cox, mental patient, is famous for driving psychologists crazy. His new shrink, Dr. Dorian, has no idea what he’s getting himself into
Disclaimer: None of it is mine… Title stolen from Blue October
For some odd reason, Dorian was still Cox’s personal psychologist.
___
Cox slammed the door open upon beginning his second visit with Newbie. This method usually put shrinks on their toes right away, made them jumpy and nervous, just the way Cox liked ‘em.
Only it didn’t quite work on Newbie. Despite the ear-shattering bang, he was just sitting in his chair, staring off into space.
“Hey! Shirley!” Cox said, waving a hand in front of Dorian’s face. “Wake up.” Newbie started.
“Huh?” He looked around. “Oh, Mr. Cox! Sorry, just kinda off in my head for a second-”
“Are you stoned?” Cox demanded, arms crossed over his chest.
“Wha? No!” Newbie spluttered, his expression shocked. Cox rolled his eyes in a disbelieving way and flopped down on the couch. “Really, I just-”
“Do I care?” Cox interrupted. Newbie muttered something under his breath. “What was that?”
“Nothing.” Dorian dipped his head to scribble out a note on his clipboard. There was an awkward pause, only interrupted by the scratch of pen on paper. “So, Mr. Cox, what do you want to talk about?”
“Darla, if you expect me to lay on this couch and vomit out my feelings, then you really are stoned.” More notes. “And if you write one more damn word I will feed you that clipboard.” The scribbling stopped.
“Okay, you don’t have to talk about your feelings if you don’t want to.” Newbie squeaked, still probably imagining Cox shoving the plastic slab down his throat. “How about… food?”
“Food?” Cox raised an eyebrow.
“I’m hungry,” Newbie said apologetically. “Haven’t eaten lunch yet.” Cox rolled his eyes again. “What’s good around here?”
Cox snorted. “Newbie, this is a nuthouse. As with all government funded institutions, the food is te-herrible.” Cox saw Newbie’s hand twitch, as though he wanted to write a note about that. Instead he nodded.
“How about outside food? Anything good around here?” He asked conversationally, but Cox had seen shrinks pull this trick before. Get the crazy to talk about something pointless and establish a relationship.
“Well, Angela, there’s this bar about a mile west of here that has sinfully good chicken wings, but I don’t think you’d want to go there.” He could almost hear Newbie’s stomach rumbling at the mention of food.
“Why not?” Dorian was definitely getting invested in the conversation, losing his detached psychologist tone.
“They wouldn’t even let you in the door, Sheila.” Cox said, trying not to laugh.
“They will too!” Newbie said, his voice now high pitched and extremely involved. Cox was exerting all his willpower not to start laughing right there.
“I doubt it.”
“What’s the name of this bar?” Newbie asked, his jaw set at a stubborn angle.
“The Balance Beam.” Newbie nodded.
___
At the end of their session, Newbie left in a hurry, already in the hallway before Cox stood up.
“Dude, where the hell are you going?” Cox heard Baldy ask from the hall.
“C’mon brown bear!” Newbie said. “We’re gong to lunch!”
Cox sat up on the couch, grinning. Man shrinks were gullible.
___
“You sent me to a gay bar.” Newbie accused.
“I don’t like him.” Lurch said.
Cox was grinning again. This rookie kept making mistake after mistake. And trying to talk to him during lunch, with all the other crazies around him, was the biggest one yet.
“I told you they wouldn’t let you in. That bar is for grown men only.” Newbie scowled at him. At least Cox guessed it was a scowl, it looked more like a pout with those big, soft lips of his. Why was he thinking about Newbie’s lips?
“Don’t worry about it, Sport.” Kelso said, looking about as evil as Santa Claus. That’s how he reeled people in. He let them think he was just a harmless old man, and then…
“Thanks Mr. Kelso.” Newbie said, obviously buying it. Cox quickly weighed his hatred of Kelso against how much he wanted to torture Dorian.
He decided not to warn Newbie.
___
Perry was back in that house again. The not-so-dead-man was there. So was his little sister.
Paige huddled in the corner, sobbing and shaking. Like in so many other dreams, Perry wrapped his arms around her, letting the bottles break in his back instead of hers.
The dreams hurt less when he wasn’t alone.
___
“And I spent so much time at the hospital, most of the doctors and nurses have restraining orders against me. Apparently it’s too much to ask to call their home phone numbers if I think I’m getting a rash.” Korman was explaining, for the hundredth time at least, why he was in the wacky shack.
During group, Maddox had asked everyone why they thought they were in there. Sending Doug stuttering into a list of all the creative accidental ways to kill people (Cox took a few mental notes), Lurch adopted a German accent and told everyone that he had post-traumatic-stress-disorder, and Korman went on his hypochondriac rant.
“What about you, Perry?” He raised an eyebrow at Maddox.
“Why doncha just go ahead and pick someone else to bother.”
“Perry…” She said, her perky tone going south.
“Fine.” He said in the snarkiest way possible. “I’m here in the nuthouse because I am certifiably insane. D’ya know how I know? Because we all are. Everyone here is nuts, and I don’t plan on staying P.C. for their sake. So why don’t you take your ‘treatment’ and blow it out your ass.” Maddox’s mouth dropped open. Along with everyone else’s.
Including Newbie, who Cox just noticed was standing just outside of the circle watching all of this.
Shit. They were going to have to talk about this, weren’t they.
___
“Why are you here? Really.” The first question Newbie asked him after he flopped onto the leather couch.
“You’re on dangerous ground now, Debbie.”
“And why do you keep calling me girl’s names?” Cox huffed and rolled his eyes.
“Because, Angela, I honestly thought you were a girl. Though now I don’t really know why, considering that grapefruit in your windpipe.” Newbie placed a hand over his Adam’s apple.
“Uncool.” He muttered. Cox rolled his eyes.
“Why the hell are you here then, Newbie?” There was a silence, and Cox moved from his reclining position to get a look at the shrink. Dorian wasn’t ignoring the question, or looking pissed off at him. He was staring at a random point on the ceiling, frowning in concentration. Light from the window was hitting him in just the right way to make him look like a living statue.
Cox didn’t know when he started noticing details like this. Maybe he was going crazier.
“I guess…” Newbie sighed, still staring off into space. “Because of my mom.”
Cox raised an eyebrow sarcastically, but didn’t reply.
“She’s a drunk. Since I was little, I sorta thought that maybe, if I was smart enough, I could make her better. Now I know I can’t change her, but it turns out I love this job anyway.” He gave Cox a sad smile.
He had no idea how to reply to that, so he just opened his mouth and let something come out.
“Dear god, Melinda. Are you trying to make me puke?”
Author: Blu (BluAlbino)
Pairing: JD/Dr. Cox
Rating: T/PG-13
Warnings: AU
Summary: Percival Cox, mental patient, is famous for driving psychologists crazy. His new shrink, Dr. Dorian, has no idea what he’s getting himself into
Disclaimer: None of it is mine… Title stolen from Blue October
For some odd reason, Dorian was still Cox’s personal psychologist.
___
Cox slammed the door open upon beginning his second visit with Newbie. This method usually put shrinks on their toes right away, made them jumpy and nervous, just the way Cox liked ‘em.
Only it didn’t quite work on Newbie. Despite the ear-shattering bang, he was just sitting in his chair, staring off into space.
“Hey! Shirley!” Cox said, waving a hand in front of Dorian’s face. “Wake up.” Newbie started.
“Huh?” He looked around. “Oh, Mr. Cox! Sorry, just kinda off in my head for a second-”
“Are you stoned?” Cox demanded, arms crossed over his chest.
“Wha? No!” Newbie spluttered, his expression shocked. Cox rolled his eyes in a disbelieving way and flopped down on the couch. “Really, I just-”
“Do I care?” Cox interrupted. Newbie muttered something under his breath. “What was that?”
“Nothing.” Dorian dipped his head to scribble out a note on his clipboard. There was an awkward pause, only interrupted by the scratch of pen on paper. “So, Mr. Cox, what do you want to talk about?”
“Darla, if you expect me to lay on this couch and vomit out my feelings, then you really are stoned.” More notes. “And if you write one more damn word I will feed you that clipboard.” The scribbling stopped.
“Okay, you don’t have to talk about your feelings if you don’t want to.” Newbie squeaked, still probably imagining Cox shoving the plastic slab down his throat. “How about… food?”
“Food?” Cox raised an eyebrow.
“I’m hungry,” Newbie said apologetically. “Haven’t eaten lunch yet.” Cox rolled his eyes again. “What’s good around here?”
Cox snorted. “Newbie, this is a nuthouse. As with all government funded institutions, the food is te-herrible.” Cox saw Newbie’s hand twitch, as though he wanted to write a note about that. Instead he nodded.
“How about outside food? Anything good around here?” He asked conversationally, but Cox had seen shrinks pull this trick before. Get the crazy to talk about something pointless and establish a relationship.
“Well, Angela, there’s this bar about a mile west of here that has sinfully good chicken wings, but I don’t think you’d want to go there.” He could almost hear Newbie’s stomach rumbling at the mention of food.
“Why not?” Dorian was definitely getting invested in the conversation, losing his detached psychologist tone.
“They wouldn’t even let you in the door, Sheila.” Cox said, trying not to laugh.
“They will too!” Newbie said, his voice now high pitched and extremely involved. Cox was exerting all his willpower not to start laughing right there.
“I doubt it.”
“What’s the name of this bar?” Newbie asked, his jaw set at a stubborn angle.
“The Balance Beam.” Newbie nodded.
___
At the end of their session, Newbie left in a hurry, already in the hallway before Cox stood up.
“Dude, where the hell are you going?” Cox heard Baldy ask from the hall.
“C’mon brown bear!” Newbie said. “We’re gong to lunch!”
Cox sat up on the couch, grinning. Man shrinks were gullible.
___
“You sent me to a gay bar.” Newbie accused.
“I don’t like him.” Lurch said.
Cox was grinning again. This rookie kept making mistake after mistake. And trying to talk to him during lunch, with all the other crazies around him, was the biggest one yet.
“I told you they wouldn’t let you in. That bar is for grown men only.” Newbie scowled at him. At least Cox guessed it was a scowl, it looked more like a pout with those big, soft lips of his. Why was he thinking about Newbie’s lips?
“Don’t worry about it, Sport.” Kelso said, looking about as evil as Santa Claus. That’s how he reeled people in. He let them think he was just a harmless old man, and then…
“Thanks Mr. Kelso.” Newbie said, obviously buying it. Cox quickly weighed his hatred of Kelso against how much he wanted to torture Dorian.
He decided not to warn Newbie.
___
Perry was back in that house again. The not-so-dead-man was there. So was his little sister.
Paige huddled in the corner, sobbing and shaking. Like in so many other dreams, Perry wrapped his arms around her, letting the bottles break in his back instead of hers.
The dreams hurt less when he wasn’t alone.
___
“And I spent so much time at the hospital, most of the doctors and nurses have restraining orders against me. Apparently it’s too much to ask to call their home phone numbers if I think I’m getting a rash.” Korman was explaining, for the hundredth time at least, why he was in the wacky shack.
During group, Maddox had asked everyone why they thought they were in there. Sending Doug stuttering into a list of all the creative accidental ways to kill people (Cox took a few mental notes), Lurch adopted a German accent and told everyone that he had post-traumatic-stress-disorder, and Korman went on his hypochondriac rant.
“What about you, Perry?” He raised an eyebrow at Maddox.
“Why doncha just go ahead and pick someone else to bother.”
“Perry…” She said, her perky tone going south.
“Fine.” He said in the snarkiest way possible. “I’m here in the nuthouse because I am certifiably insane. D’ya know how I know? Because we all are. Everyone here is nuts, and I don’t plan on staying P.C. for their sake. So why don’t you take your ‘treatment’ and blow it out your ass.” Maddox’s mouth dropped open. Along with everyone else’s.
Including Newbie, who Cox just noticed was standing just outside of the circle watching all of this.
Shit. They were going to have to talk about this, weren’t they.
___
“Why are you here? Really.” The first question Newbie asked him after he flopped onto the leather couch.
“You’re on dangerous ground now, Debbie.”
“And why do you keep calling me girl’s names?” Cox huffed and rolled his eyes.
“Because, Angela, I honestly thought you were a girl. Though now I don’t really know why, considering that grapefruit in your windpipe.” Newbie placed a hand over his Adam’s apple.
“Uncool.” He muttered. Cox rolled his eyes.
“Why the hell are you here then, Newbie?” There was a silence, and Cox moved from his reclining position to get a look at the shrink. Dorian wasn’t ignoring the question, or looking pissed off at him. He was staring at a random point on the ceiling, frowning in concentration. Light from the window was hitting him in just the right way to make him look like a living statue.
Cox didn’t know when he started noticing details like this. Maybe he was going crazier.
“I guess…” Newbie sighed, still staring off into space. “Because of my mom.”
Cox raised an eyebrow sarcastically, but didn’t reply.
“She’s a drunk. Since I was little, I sorta thought that maybe, if I was smart enough, I could make her better. Now I know I can’t change her, but it turns out I love this job anyway.” He gave Cox a sad smile.
He had no idea how to reply to that, so he just opened his mouth and let something come out.
“Dear god, Melinda. Are you trying to make me puke?”