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Consent to Treatment (3/?)
Title: Consent to Treatment (3/?)
Author: Blu (BluAlbino)
Pairing: JD/Dr. Cox
Rating: T/PG-13
Warnings: AU
Summary: Percival Cox, mental patient, is famous for driving psychologists crazy. His new shrink, Dr. Dorian, has no idea what he’s getting himself into
Disclaimer: None of it is mine… Title stolen from Blue October
Lurch was one of the most interesting people Cox had ever met. Aside from his obsession with taxidermy and his odd way of switching accents mid-conversation, he had some pretty random habits.
Cox’s favorite was the way Lurch latched on to people.
If the tall nut job was having a particularly stressful day, he would pick one random person and just mess with them as often as possible. Take last month, when the nurse who handed out the knockout pills around lights-out apparently looked at him funny.
For about a week, she kept mysteriously losing small objects. Pens disappeared as soon as she set them down, paperwork would magically vacate her desk when she wasn’t in the room, and she eventually bolted the telephone to the wall after it had to be replaced a few times. Also, coincidentally, at the same time one bright red stapler seemed to follow her around, often replacing missing objects, until the nurse decided that Sacred Hands was not a good place for her mental health.
Their new pill-nurse was much nicer.
___
Cox found Lurch leaning against a wall in the hallway, not-so-subtly glaring at Newbie. Newbie was looking back at him like a frightened rabbit. Or possibly a deer, but moving.
“Wha’cha doin’ there, Lurch?” Cox asked.
“Planning.” He didn’t look away from Dorian. That was never a good sign.
___
The next time Cox had one of his sessions with Newbie, the shrink looked tired, flustered, frustrated, and more tired.
“Someone missed their beauty sleep,” Cox said, resting on the couch with his fingers laced behind his head.
“Yeah.” Newbie said, stifling a yawn. “I think the alarm-clock on my cell phone is broken. It went off at least four times last night, and it kept turning itself back on after I turned it off. At around three AM I just took the battery out of it.”
Cox had to hand it to Lurch. The man was a good planner
___
Over the next few days technology just seemed to malfunction around Newbie. Beepers went off at inappropriate times, TVs flickered and hissed, the radio went static-y whenever he went within three feet of it. Cox had no idea how Lurch could be pulling this off. Unless he had somehow magnetized Newbie, but that was crazy.
Right?
___
“Hey Newbie,” Cox asked at their next session. The bags under Dorian’s eyes prominent. “Get any gifts lately?”
“Erm…” Newbie said, his reactions stress-slowed. “Yeah, that big guy gave me this nice pen a couple days ago.”
“Huh.” Cox huffed. “Hand it over.” Newbie raised an eyebrow, but fished the pen out of his pocket. It was nice, black and shiny with a twisty bottom and a sharp gold point. How Lurch got these sort of things in here Cox would never know.
Cox threw the pen/mindfuck device on the floor and brought a slipper-clad foot down on top of it.
“Hey!” Newbie said, waking up slightly.
“Trust me, kid. I just did you a favor.”
His foot hurt.
___
Cox limped into the cafeteria, fully prepared for the Wrath of Lurch. He only smashed the damn pen an hour ago, but he had a feeling that the big guy already knew. He sat down at the table with his lunch, green Jell-O this time. Lurch said nothing. Doug, following their example, said nothing. Kelso wasn’t there.
“Uh, wh-why isn’t anyone talking?” Doug finally asked, unable to stand the silence any longer.
“No reason.” Lurch said, talking to Doug but not breaking eye contact with Cox.
Yeah, he knew.
___
Lights out. The time when all the good little crazies went to bed.
Cox was not a good little crazy. Especially at the very unmanly hour of ten PM.
___
Laying in his bunk with his eyes closed, Cox saw the lights flicker out through his eyelids.
“The coast is c-clear.” Doug whispered after a second. Cox opened his eyes and sat up in a flash, along with the ward’s other night-owls.
“So, what’ll it be tonight, fellas?” Said Korman, rubbing his hands together. Cox recently found out that he was a bit of a gambling addict as well as a hypochondriac. “Cards or dice?”
“Cards. Ante-up, Korman.” The hypochondriac grinned and fished some coins out of his pocket. They were mostly pennies and dimes, and had almost no value whatsoever in Sacred Hands, but it was the principle of the matter.
Redhead Keith joined the game, betting with little swirly peppermint candies his mom brought for him the last time she visited.
So did Kevin Casey, a short guy with severe OCD. The only reason he was still in their ward was because he’d had a panic attack when they tried to move him.
“Will ya just bet already, Casey.” Cox said. Kevin had just finished putting his cards in order and was currently stacking his chips, all shiny new quarters, into even columns.
“Hey, you should just be glad I’m not disinfecting these bad boys.” Casey said, not looking up from his quarters.
Doug perched on a nearby bed, watching. He was a horrible poker player. His stutter increased when he bluffed.
Kelso was in his bunk, so used to the noise of late-night card games that he could sleep right through them. The others were glad, his snores covered up most of the sounds they made.
___
Around midnight, after winning most of Keith’s peppermints, Cox crashed on his bunk. Korman walked away grumbling, pockets now empty. Casey still had all his quarters, and gave Keith back all the unsymmetrical candy he’d won.
It was a good night.
___
At breakfast that morning, Kelso wasn’t there again. Possibly because his elderly sixth sense warned him away from the table. The tension between Cox and Lurch was slowly eating away at what was left of Doug’s sanity. He was too scared to move away.
Neither of them were going to budge on this. It was a battle of wills between two very stubborn, crazy men.
It would all come down to who got the other first.
___
Cox found himself knocking on Newbie’s door. Not something he ever imagined doing, but he wanted to see if Lurch he given him any more ‘presents.’ More to piss off the crazy than to help Dorian.
“Just a sec.” He heard Newbie through the door. He was with someone.
Newbie opened the door slightly, then flung it wide when he saw who his visitor was.
“Mr. Cox!” He said, grinning. Cox scowled reflexively.
“Perry.” Kelso said in greeting, sitting on the couch and eating a cheeseburger.
“Bobbo?” Newbie looked from him to Kelso, then back to Cox. He blushed.
“Uh…well during our sessions he asked if I could….you won’t tell anyone I brought in outside food will you?” Cox just shook his head and walked away.
“What crawled up his ass and died?” Cox heard Kelso mumble through a full mouth.
And the funny thing is, Cox didn’t know what. If he looked a bit closer at his motives, wich he almost never did, he would guess it was because Newbie was Kelso’s shrink too, and that made him angry. Hell, Dorian probably had a lot of patients. He’d sort of forgotten that he didn’t have Newbie all to himself and-
Fuck.
This is why he didn’t like to think these things through.
Author: Blu (BluAlbino)
Pairing: JD/Dr. Cox
Rating: T/PG-13
Warnings: AU
Summary: Percival Cox, mental patient, is famous for driving psychologists crazy. His new shrink, Dr. Dorian, has no idea what he’s getting himself into
Disclaimer: None of it is mine… Title stolen from Blue October
Lurch was one of the most interesting people Cox had ever met. Aside from his obsession with taxidermy and his odd way of switching accents mid-conversation, he had some pretty random habits.
Cox’s favorite was the way Lurch latched on to people.
If the tall nut job was having a particularly stressful day, he would pick one random person and just mess with them as often as possible. Take last month, when the nurse who handed out the knockout pills around lights-out apparently looked at him funny.
For about a week, she kept mysteriously losing small objects. Pens disappeared as soon as she set them down, paperwork would magically vacate her desk when she wasn’t in the room, and she eventually bolted the telephone to the wall after it had to be replaced a few times. Also, coincidentally, at the same time one bright red stapler seemed to follow her around, often replacing missing objects, until the nurse decided that Sacred Hands was not a good place for her mental health.
Their new pill-nurse was much nicer.
___
Cox found Lurch leaning against a wall in the hallway, not-so-subtly glaring at Newbie. Newbie was looking back at him like a frightened rabbit. Or possibly a deer, but moving.
“Wha’cha doin’ there, Lurch?” Cox asked.
“Planning.” He didn’t look away from Dorian. That was never a good sign.
___
The next time Cox had one of his sessions with Newbie, the shrink looked tired, flustered, frustrated, and more tired.
“Someone missed their beauty sleep,” Cox said, resting on the couch with his fingers laced behind his head.
“Yeah.” Newbie said, stifling a yawn. “I think the alarm-clock on my cell phone is broken. It went off at least four times last night, and it kept turning itself back on after I turned it off. At around three AM I just took the battery out of it.”
Cox had to hand it to Lurch. The man was a good planner
___
Over the next few days technology just seemed to malfunction around Newbie. Beepers went off at inappropriate times, TVs flickered and hissed, the radio went static-y whenever he went within three feet of it. Cox had no idea how Lurch could be pulling this off. Unless he had somehow magnetized Newbie, but that was crazy.
Right?
___
“Hey Newbie,” Cox asked at their next session. The bags under Dorian’s eyes prominent. “Get any gifts lately?”
“Erm…” Newbie said, his reactions stress-slowed. “Yeah, that big guy gave me this nice pen a couple days ago.”
“Huh.” Cox huffed. “Hand it over.” Newbie raised an eyebrow, but fished the pen out of his pocket. It was nice, black and shiny with a twisty bottom and a sharp gold point. How Lurch got these sort of things in here Cox would never know.
Cox threw the pen/mindfuck device on the floor and brought a slipper-clad foot down on top of it.
“Hey!” Newbie said, waking up slightly.
“Trust me, kid. I just did you a favor.”
His foot hurt.
___
Cox limped into the cafeteria, fully prepared for the Wrath of Lurch. He only smashed the damn pen an hour ago, but he had a feeling that the big guy already knew. He sat down at the table with his lunch, green Jell-O this time. Lurch said nothing. Doug, following their example, said nothing. Kelso wasn’t there.
“Uh, wh-why isn’t anyone talking?” Doug finally asked, unable to stand the silence any longer.
“No reason.” Lurch said, talking to Doug but not breaking eye contact with Cox.
Yeah, he knew.
___
Lights out. The time when all the good little crazies went to bed.
Cox was not a good little crazy. Especially at the very unmanly hour of ten PM.
___
Laying in his bunk with his eyes closed, Cox saw the lights flicker out through his eyelids.
“The coast is c-clear.” Doug whispered after a second. Cox opened his eyes and sat up in a flash, along with the ward’s other night-owls.
“So, what’ll it be tonight, fellas?” Said Korman, rubbing his hands together. Cox recently found out that he was a bit of a gambling addict as well as a hypochondriac. “Cards or dice?”
“Cards. Ante-up, Korman.” The hypochondriac grinned and fished some coins out of his pocket. They were mostly pennies and dimes, and had almost no value whatsoever in Sacred Hands, but it was the principle of the matter.
Redhead Keith joined the game, betting with little swirly peppermint candies his mom brought for him the last time she visited.
So did Kevin Casey, a short guy with severe OCD. The only reason he was still in their ward was because he’d had a panic attack when they tried to move him.
“Will ya just bet already, Casey.” Cox said. Kevin had just finished putting his cards in order and was currently stacking his chips, all shiny new quarters, into even columns.
“Hey, you should just be glad I’m not disinfecting these bad boys.” Casey said, not looking up from his quarters.
Doug perched on a nearby bed, watching. He was a horrible poker player. His stutter increased when he bluffed.
Kelso was in his bunk, so used to the noise of late-night card games that he could sleep right through them. The others were glad, his snores covered up most of the sounds they made.
___
Around midnight, after winning most of Keith’s peppermints, Cox crashed on his bunk. Korman walked away grumbling, pockets now empty. Casey still had all his quarters, and gave Keith back all the unsymmetrical candy he’d won.
It was a good night.
___
At breakfast that morning, Kelso wasn’t there again. Possibly because his elderly sixth sense warned him away from the table. The tension between Cox and Lurch was slowly eating away at what was left of Doug’s sanity. He was too scared to move away.
Neither of them were going to budge on this. It was a battle of wills between two very stubborn, crazy men.
It would all come down to who got the other first.
___
Cox found himself knocking on Newbie’s door. Not something he ever imagined doing, but he wanted to see if Lurch he given him any more ‘presents.’ More to piss off the crazy than to help Dorian.
“Just a sec.” He heard Newbie through the door. He was with someone.
Newbie opened the door slightly, then flung it wide when he saw who his visitor was.
“Mr. Cox!” He said, grinning. Cox scowled reflexively.
“Perry.” Kelso said in greeting, sitting on the couch and eating a cheeseburger.
“Bobbo?” Newbie looked from him to Kelso, then back to Cox. He blushed.
“Uh…well during our sessions he asked if I could….you won’t tell anyone I brought in outside food will you?” Cox just shook his head and walked away.
“What crawled up his ass and died?” Cox heard Kelso mumble through a full mouth.
And the funny thing is, Cox didn’t know what. If he looked a bit closer at his motives, wich he almost never did, he would guess it was because Newbie was Kelso’s shrink too, and that made him angry. Hell, Dorian probably had a lot of patients. He’d sort of forgotten that he didn’t have Newbie all to himself and-
Fuck.
This is why he didn’t like to think these things through.